Children today are under pressure like never before. No sooner have they left the cosy confines of Nursery School then they start working toward their SATs. Places at popular Secondary Schools are like gold dust, and should they gain a place at the school of their choice, then the pressure is really on to perform well.
All of this is at a time when divorce is at an all time high, and economic pressures force both parents to work so adding more stress to the family unit.
Unable to articulate their fears and unhappiness, many children begin to behave badly. Teachers and counsellors are dealing with unhappy, angry children at an unprecedented level.
As a loving parent or carer, what can you do about it? The most important thing is to make sure that you are all playing on the same field. All adults involved in the care of a child need to choose a calm time to discuss the guidelines you are going to give your child. It is essential that there is 100% agreement, so there may have to be a little give and take between you. If, for instance, one parent forbids football in the house, for the other to allow it undermines the authority of both, whilst confusing the child. Once you have decided on the behaviour you expect - and remember, you are the only people who can guide your child to grow into a nice adult - then you need to make your guidelines clear to your child. You also need to decide, as a family, a set of rewards and sanctions. These should be appropriate to the transgression (or indeed the good behaviour), enforcable and as immediate as possible. The benefit of deciding upon sanctions in advance is that you no longer scream unenforcable penalties in the heat of the moment. And believe me, we've all done it!
You might also want to think about your child's diet. There are so many E numbers, sugar, salt, fat and assorted baddies in our food, it's no wonder children's behaviour can be affected. Unfortunately, if both parents work and/or money is in short supply, then fast or processed food is often the only reasonable option. If you think that your child's behaviour may be affected by their food, it's worth a visit to your GP to ask for a referral to a nutritionist. Alternatively, a private Nutritional Therapist is a good option. Either will be able to help you plan easy, affordable meals which benefit your child's mental and physical health. Luckily, school dinners have improved beyond measure recently. Gone are Spam Fritters floating in orange fat! Today's meals are healthy, tasty and the perfect solution for busy families. If you haven't seen a menu recently, ask your school's secretary.
I am a fully qualified hypnotherapist, holding an HPD - the only qualification recognised by the DFEE. I can work alongside your family and your GP to help your child to deal with their unhelpful emotions and the consequences of those feelings, such as bed wetting and bad behaviour. Even children suffering from AD/HD can benefit from a course of hypnotherapy. I can give them the tools they need to live happy and successful lives.
